Tough times
I've had this blog for a few years now...
I loved writing and art and music and netball and being busy, so I wanted to share some of that excitement with whoever wanted to know about it. So I'd write, get all phsyched up about it and then forget about it for a few months. Which is fine, life happens :) (And I forget. A lot)
I loved writing and art and music and netball and being busy, so I wanted to share some of that excitement with whoever wanted to know about it. So I'd write, get all phsyched up about it and then forget about it for a few months. Which is fine, life happens :) (And I forget. A lot)
I now have a beautiful three year old daughter who's kept me feeling alive and excited and all the warm and fuzzy feelings that go with it :D
I'm your typical "morning person".. I jump out of bed shouting "Yay, what a beautiful day!" And I'll tickle you until you wake up or sing a song or jump on the bed and giggle like a little girl. - Yes, I'm that annoying person you want to kill when you open your eyes ;)
I lòve my job, I have the greatest little family, life is just a ball!
I lòve my job, I have the greatest little family, life is just a ball!
Well, it used to be. Now I'm nòt that happy, giggly woman anymore.
I'm 36 weeks pregnant with my second girl and I've been having a tough time. Two days ago my body decided that it's had enough.
From about 22 weeks I've had constant pain, which limited my movements & activities. I couldn't go for walks with my daughter riding her bike, my pilates instructor had to adjust my movements, it got really hard to work, and for a busy bee like myself it was quite devastating.
From about 22 weeks I've had constant pain, which limited my movements & activities. I couldn't go for walks with my daughter riding her bike, my pilates instructor had to adjust my movements, it got really hard to work, and for a busy bee like myself it was quite devastating.
I was frustrated but knew it's only temporary and it'll be sò worth it! Hah... try saying thàt to yourself everyday for almost 3 months...
Now, I can barely walk. I'm scared to drive and working from home. Yesterday I collapsed getting out of the shower walking to my bedroom because of a cramp in my butt. Yes, I laughed about it! (And then cried)
This morning at 5am I had to pee and it felt like my left leg was tearing away from my body. I cried getting back to bed because of the pain.
This morning at 5am I had to pee and it felt like my left leg was tearing away from my body. I cried getting back to bed because of the pain.
Nope. Not fun. My husband consoled me and warmed up my beanbag for me. I'm lucky for having a loving and caring husband who helps a lot.
Still, I felt like shit. Feeling this helpless makes me want to run away - but I literally can't. I'm overwhelmed and hate feeling like this.
Still, I felt like shit. Feeling this helpless makes me want to run away - but I literally can't. I'm overwhelmed and hate feeling like this.
Most of all, I hate the fact that I can't tell the people that want to know how it's going that it's going 'great!', because it usually is!
And you know what? That's OKAY!!!
It's okay to ask for help. It's okay to tell people the truth and that it's not going well. That you're nòt super excited about life right now. That you're struggling to keep it together, because if you don't, you get depressed and the people closest to you suffer.
So be angry, get mad, CRY!!! It's okay ♡
It wìll get better. Maybe not tomorrow, maybe not even next week. But we don't have to hide it or be ashamed of it. You'd be surprised how many people feel the same way or could learn something from it...
xxx
Zelda eks daar deur vriendin. Dis eina Carlo het ook vroeg gesak wat geweldig druk op my lae rug en bekkenbeen geplaas het dat jy dink jy loop nog dan opsit jy op jou boude! En as 'n mamma was my laaste trimester in my seuntjie se potty training! Jy sal weet jys daar deur... Met die pain sit jy maar voor daai potjie en kyk boekies deur as dit nou sulke tyd is... Met hier groot maag en die baba wat skop en strek en rek want hy hou nie van die posisie waarin jy sit nie... Eina! As 'n juffrou, 'n graad een juffrou was my beweging beperk, my manne het gereeld 'n stoeltjie rond gedra in klas want ek kon nie agter die maatjies se tafel staan en hul hy help nie moes hy hul tafel gaan sit het! Jaco my eersteling het arme Carlo rond gestamp gestoot en ge-wwf in my maag. Laaities is rof jong...
ReplyDeleteTot daardie kraam pyne gekom het 'n tweede keer en jy weet presies hoe dit voel en waardeer jy nou moet gaan om daardie nuweling vas te hou! Eina... Maar ai as die bondeltjie eers sy eerste huil gee dan loop die trane van trots....
My liefste liefste vriendin die tough hou nie daarop nie! Elke liewe dag het sy nuwe uitdagings... Maar een groot voordeel is jy as persoon het die krag en energie en nie daardie gebrek aan beweging nie en dit ja dit maak dit bietjie makliker! Sterkte Zellie! Vasbyt en ja moet nooit dink jy kan als self hanteer nie... Ek hang aan my ma my pê my broer en man... Sonder hulle sou ek en my twee bondeltjies nie so gelukkig en tevrede kon wees nie!
Jammer vir paar tik foute.. Jou tyd is so beperk dat jy tik jou se en dan moet jy hol want of iemand huil of iemand soek 'n koekie.. Hahahaha
DeleteJammer vir paar tik foute.. Jou tyd is so beperk dat jy tik jou se en dan moet jy hol want of iemand huil of iemand soek 'n koekie.. Hahahaha
DeleteAah dankie Carin! Ek waardeer elke woordjie. En dis so belangrik, want mens besef jy's nie alleen nie en dit help tonne! Xxx
ReplyDelete